I'm talking to two guys and am not interested in either of them. One doesn't even have a job, he's trying to work at the local electric company. He had a bloodclot in his leg, and had to quit his job to recover. Not that he's a bum, but now he's well and wants to work and well ... that's not what I want.

The other guy, is okay, seems to eager to date, has lower self esteem than I do. Seemingly could break this man if I were to say anything negative about him.

I'm not interested in either man, but enjoy the attention. Feeling that someone wants me, and yet feeling it'll never be anything because I think of them and they aren't what I want.

Can I chalk them into experience? Should I date them knowing it won't work out?

These things are the weriod areas of life that is shaded and no one speaks of. Friends with benefits has been tossed around, but my upbringing, my morals, all sneer at the very thought of it.

I got pills yesterday from the GYN that will make my hormones go correctly supposedly. I read the bottle and laughed: may cause irregular periods.... Isn't that what I want to get rid of?

It's a pill w/ hormones in it, so that means I'll feel ill today - symptoms, nausea, dizziness, loss of appetite, bloating.

So far, I feel okay. So far I'm chowing on yogurt to end my yeast inf. - it's better, but still here a little bit. Still feeling burning ... whatever.

Other than this was happy when I told fellow co-worker about NOT having pcos ... and told her I have to lose weight to be regular. She said oh that can't be it, you're not that overweight. That felt nice to hear.

So anyway I hear if I get that job today, feel nervous but look pretty and confident today. Today is that "purse party" that another co-worker invited me to. I don't want to go, but everyone says to go and be "social" ... I guess it's time I do that isn't it?

Will update later about job, well if I get it ... whatever, maybe.

�

pet ramps