I just got home from work ... I worked an hour and a half over so tomorrow won't be that bad.

In a word, I'm fed up today.

It began with those people who interviewed me LAST WEEK at this time ... who said to me "we'll contact you at the beginning or mid-next week" ... so it's Wednesday, and nothing.

I called and left a message. Something like, Hi. I am calling to see the status of this job. I am still very much interested. Please call me back or drop me an email ...*pause*... I want to know either way and be kept up to date on this.

I was fed up when I made that call.

What began that mode is my sister. I called home prior to that call to see if that company HAD called. She said no they didn't. She asked if I'd spoken to Mom, I said a lil.

She said she was cleaning the living room and dining room. She said, "can you clean the bathroom?" I said ... umm okay, that's fine, I always clean the bathroom.

Then boom. Kapow. She says, "forget about it, I'll DO IT and HAVE A NICE DAY" and hung up on me.

I sat there stunned. I went over the conversation in my head. I didn't use any particular sounding sarcastic voice. Just kind of like okay, whatever, type of voice.

The more I thought about it, the more upset I became. I was sitting there tearing up cause I was so pissed off. I mean here I am on the craziest day at work, I dont' know how to do my bosses job all the way correctly, I'm worried about this job thing and worried about my GYN appt/something wrong w/ me ... and she hangs up on me for saying...nothing?

So I called my mom and told her and Mom asked point blank ..."is she on birth control?" I said...that's none of my business to say ... (she is) ... so yeah.

Then I said HAVE TO MOVE OUT. I can't take this walking on egg shells and now when she gets home it'll be all hostile.

I'm not talking to her, fuck her and her shitty ass hormone attitude. I really thought about looking seriously for an apartment now ... but alas I have to save money. My credit card bill is very down - it's only at $220? I've worked on it for a month now to get it down ... other than that, I have about $700 in my account.

I hate being poor, I can't save money because I also have to pay $100 for my medical bills ala' sprained ankle bill. Pay $92 to see my doctor for 5 minutes.

I want to have at least $1,000 saved up when I choose to move out...I can't go out on nothing. I know I'll be living on nothing so whatever. IF ONLY I could get this Chicago job, it answers a lot of my prayers...money situation and job unhappiness ... man.

I'll stop bitchin' cause I'm pissing myself off.

Oh yeah my sister said she won't run the a/c anymore in an effort to save money. Note tomorrow is going to be 90 degrees.

That's just another reason I have to move out, I can't take sleeping in a 85 degree bedroom, fuck that.

And the other day, I kinda felt weriod cause before I moved back she made my room into like a sCRAPbook room. SO I put all of my stuff in like plastic drawers - because there was no other place to put my shit. So undies in one, bras in another, and socks, bills, etc. etc.

So she told me I need to clean them out because she wants to use the stuff in them. I was like...what the fuck am I going to do with my stuff?

She said she didn't want to go through them because I might have personal stuff in them.

I kinda shuttered. Did she ... uh ... find my ... ummm female...product that starts with a V? I thought I hid it well enough....

I hate to admitt I have one, but I feel sickened that anyone I know PERSONALLY would know I have one.

Strangers like you, okay, whatever I don't care cause you don't know me. But yeah...I felt kinda grossed out by that thought.

And I know she'll say it's her house and her room and etc.

OH yea ... surprise, sur-fuckin'- prize ... that guy still hasn't called me for our supposed date. I'm fed up too with this. Fool me once ... shame on you ... fool me twice ... shame on me. He has until FRIDAY to call me. I'm not really hurting to go on this date either, so he can shove off.

Yeah I'm starting to become a lil bitter. Although my shittiness was a comic relief today as a conversation went like this:
Unsuspecting co-worker: "Hey Jen! How are you doing?"
Me: "Shitty and you?"

Rar ... I've just had a cruddy day, I don't like to be like this, but I just am feeling let down again by this company who hasn't called me. I mean what is wrong with me and my resume? It's like rejection...w/o knowing WHY.

Okay going to go look at apartment ads to see if maybe I can find something good. Cannot stand smell of sisters fiance ... that man/yuck smell ... the way he walks and acts, hate it, hate it. Gotta go. Gotta get out before I begin to hate. Smells of cheap ass Pine Sol ... I hate that smell, it's white trash detergent.

But other good news ... the walking team at work elected me as the team captain. Uh ... yay ... I guess. Either everyone likes me, or they don't want to do the work of keeping track.

I believe in the lather.

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pet ramps