Ah, Friday. I love Friday. Everyone is happy on Friday and you're happy because you can sleep in the next day and not have to worry about work.

Today went by in a strange fashion. It was bosses day so I brought in OJ to compliment a surprise breakfast for my boss. They went all out in his spread of breakfast food. Everyone treated me like a baby who just said it's first word ... "Look Jen brought orange juice! ... Jen brought orange juice? How nice. Jen are you hungry? Go in and eat!"

So then. Later on in the day, my funny guy whom I have a crush on is bringing down all these boxes from upstairs (my desk is in the center of the building, so I am in front of all the action!) so he looks at me tired and I make a "I'm sorry/relate" face. So he opens a box and gives me a mug with the logo of the paper on it. (See the paper has to get rid of all the old logo stuff) ... so then he opens up this huge box. It has a bunch of bags with golf towels in them with our logo on them. So he walks over and pops a WHOLE BAG on me desk.

The bag contains 10 towels. He walks away and I'm like HEY WHAT DO I DO WITH THESE!!??!?

So he walks on and everyone around me is like whattcha got? So nice Jen hands them out (my boss got a bag and she KEPT THE WHOLE BAG) ... so I give one to the guy I was a bitch to and so we're "friends" ... and everyone around me and I'm instantly good, ol' kind Jen sharing.

So my boss gets me THREE mugs. And then a magnet. And it's a free for all, every employee is scattered and people walking around with 10 mugs and luggage tags and hats and tshirts. All with an old newspaper logo on it.

I'm like...why in the hell did they keep this stuff ... like hidden? I mean they should give this stuff out to new employees.

Anyway, so funny guy comes up to me and I flip through my pages and am like "YOU'RE MISSING THIS AD!" and he's like "GOD why do you look so MEAN at me when I come up here!?"

I was stunned and speechless, I muttered...."I don't ...." and then it went on. I was like damn I'm all SMILES TO YOU ALL THE FUCKING TIME! You goon!!

But my crush on him, is turning into curiousity and a wish to sit down and just TALK to him. Like I want to say "Hey, yeah, I want to be your girl."

But I know that'll never be, I don't think he's ... I don't know into dating co-workers? Or something like that. He's not married. I think he's the funny guy that everyone is friend to, no one is lov-ar to.

So I shall have to worm and snake my way into getting bits of information. My reporter self and my gemini-snake self shall execute this programs with ease whenever I get over my nervousness with the boy and become MYSELF. My charming, sweet, friendly Jen self. That innocent girl that men just love to take care of and coo at. That is my golden ticket with guys.

I realize that people feel the need to take care of me. My mom always said I always look so lost and have this vacant plea for help always in my eyes ... child like. But she also said that I look so soft, like you could break me if you weren't careful. I guess my exterior doesn't match my interior, or maybe it does a bit.

I dunno, but it sucks when I like this guy and there is absolutely NOTHING to do about it. I can't just be like, "hey want to go out?" And what sucks is TODAY I had the PERFECT line to get to know him ... the "what are you doing this weekend?" line where I could find out if he has a girlfriend. Then that in turn could result in my "I don't have a boyfriend" line.

This COULD still work as MONDAY I could say "how was your weekend? How was your sweetest day?"

Oh lovely, Hallmark holidays, you give me good secret information questions. Questions about something unrelated, to get the answers to the my un-asked questions.

So okay, I have to be a little wormy vixen, I can do it. If only I didn't get so tongue tied.

And thank you GOD I'm finally letting go of old new guy. Finally. I'm like fuck it, whatever. The hurt is slowly leaving and today I felt really okay.

I guess it's okay to pin my feelings onto a helpless victim now does it?

Okay, whatever.

Tomorrow I FINALLY get the Indiana plates for my card and my OL' Indiana license back! :) I cannot wait. I've been WAITING for this day. I kind of hate to go to the license bureau cuz it ... just sucks to wait in line and take a number and get some rude bitch and all of that jazz. I hope it goes smoothly.

Then I go sign up at the gym! Yikes, that ought to be something. And then my checkbook will be null and void until I get paid on Friday once again.

Then...I'll be all set. Nothing left to do except save money and pay off my visa and pay my cell bill.

It's weriod to finally have things in place. Like okay, this is done, all is done, now what is the next thing?

So I don't feel that badly that I'm not a date freak like my sister. I figure I'm still trying to get shit in order with my new job (it'll be a month on the 20th) ... and all of this little shit.

After that, and I finally settle in, I'll date "seriously" whatever that means. For now, I refuse to feel like a loser because I'm not filling up my dance card.

OK so tomorrow I'm also going to do some canning for the first time! I can't wait. I bought some pears from a Michigan orchard market to make some Pear
Honey so I hope that it turns out cause I have like 10 lbs of pears sitting on the counter and 24 jars (only need 12) waiting to be sterilized and all of that shit.

Then next weekend I'm going to try Strawberry Apricot Jelly/preserves.

Erm. Let's hope they work out....

Oh well I feel kinda tired from today's shit. Plus I have to get up kinda early to go to my errands! I'm kinda nervous about the gym thing, but eh, it's for the good! Can't wait to exercise again! Lose weight even, ah. I also just stocked up on my Trim Spa. So I'm set.

Oh yeah! Last night my violin teacher bailed on me! So next week I have a hour lesson with him. I know my new string will be here by then (I hope) and I can pratice more because I was fucking up on my slurs last night when I did it on my own. Oh hum....Will I ever play well enough?

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