Well, when it comes to dating, I am most like my favorite tv show:

You Are Most Like Carrie! You're quirky, flirty, and every guy's perfect first date. But can the guy in question live up to your romantic ideal? It's tough for you to find the right match - you're more than a little picky. Never fear... You've got a great group of friends and a great closet of clothes, no matter what! Romantic prediction: You'll fall for someone this year... Totally different from any guy you've dated. Which Sex and the City Vixen Are You Most Like? Take This Quiz Right Now! Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

Yah, I know, how cheesy and goofy.

But yesterday to today, something hit me.

As tomorrow is my impending date I sat there and instantly felt not as nervous as before and make my fickle nature needed some time away from our chats.

Just to close to fast for my tastes.

So I'm standing in the kitchen and suddenly it hits me, I'll be going out on a date with a married man. Albeit, he is separated and papers are filed...but still.

I kept thinking, does he will wear his wedding band? That will be odd. Very odd if he does.

Still, the whole "he was married and has a child" thing kind of has been on my mind. I'm in no way, no means a mother type. Kids scare me, I don't understand them. I am motherly to adults though, but kids I have to warm up to. I just don't want to be *gulp* instanta mom ... or anything like that.

Yes, this is my gemini nature breaking through, that whole "you could be tied down" thing ... a serious relationship ... committment ... yikes. All roads that scare me and which I have not yet ventured into.

So yeah I'm slightly freaked.

I keep thinking married man and thinking ... am I a rebound girl?

Because I hear those always turn out bad. Though he says I'm not, who would say someone was?

So I'm ready to go and right now, this very moment, tomorrow night I'll be on the way to a restaurant with him and hopefully the conversation will be flowing and no strange silences. No talk of ex's or any heated debates.

Just fun stuff. I just hope I survive and don't get that werid feeling of why am I doing this?

Didn't tarot say I'd meet someone at work?

Oh well, no committments yet, no nothing, so I will stop freaking for the moment.

OKAY SO THE newspaper called me today and I passed the drug test! Yes!

I was freaked my Trimspa would trigger like the coke strain or something. But no, I'm drug free! :)

So I begin Monday at 9:30 with a morning route with the bitchy Human Resources person who'll tell me the nitty gritty of my benefits.

Just happy I passed my drug test. Thank you GOD for pulling this through, I did lose faith, but now it's regained two fold.

Um, I hope they still have the gym thing going because now my second phase is losing weight.

Major weightloss.

I took two TrimSpa and wow, that stuff WORKS. I had A LOT of energy and didn't feel hungry.

I've been taking them in the morning, but I know I should take one at least near night time because that's when I eat a lot.

Okay, yippeee, I just feel so good about my life right now, though a bit scared and exhilarated at all this change.

Tomorrow, I feel ... nervous, scared. No so much about how I look now, but the conversation thing. I hate those moments of silence. They suck, but I guess a moment of silence is always expected, then a laugh and someone says "well that was uncomfortable."

Hm. I will update tomorrow. Just hope my hair and makeup do what they are told. I'm going to payless to buy new shoes tomorrow. :)

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pet ramps