It feels like a strange day today. I woke up to something falling, so I jumped up and couldn't find what it was. Hate when that happens!

So I snoozed for a bit longer and then got up, showered, and made myself breakfast.

So it's like okay, I feel strange and very odd because today is my second interview.

Not that I have jitters as this is an interview with human resources. So this isn't a "what can you do, what are your strengths...etc."

It's more "how much do you want to earn?" type of thing and drug test questions and 401K and dental, vision, health and life insurance and do you want to buy stock questions.

I see this as a sign I got the job, however, a part of me, that has been unsaid has been wondering the past few days about what IF I don't get it.

It seems that possiblity has been hid by my YES I GOT THE JOB! Attitude.

So I haven't been nervous about meeting HR today, not until this morning - but it's only because of the "what if I don't get it" fact.

I'll leave it at that and know there is nothing to do but be myself and honest. That's all I can. And wish and pray and hope.

Anyway.

Well I spoke with my new guy last night. I don't know why he intrigues me and makes me want to say MEET ME in an HOUR on the corner. Yesterday I gave him my number and we're planning on a date this week sometime.

His story isn't great.

He is 36 yrs old. In the middle of a divorce - as his wife left him for a WOMAN in Texas. She moved out and left him and their 10 yr old child. He works as a manager for a IT type of thing/network.

Lives near me as well. Indiana man.

I normally wouldn't go for a guy like this as he does have some baggage - in the form of a divorce after 13 yrs marriage and a 10 yr old son.

I can deal with divorces, but kids? I'm not good with kids. And I know that will always come first in his life.

But alas, I'm stupid over him for some reason. He's so warm and friendly and needy.

And I know it's probably wrong because I think it's to soon for him to be dating, but maybe he needs this to feel better about himself.

I think he's cute and I think he's remotely intelligent.

Naturally, I worry about MYSELF and how I look. And I know he's like me and worrying how he'll look to me. He hasn't dated anyone since high school ... so he is rusty he says.

And indeed he is, for an internet first meeting, he wanted to pick me up! Ha. I was like dude ... there is a lot for you to learn.

I asked him what he wanted and he wants a committed relationship (he's a cancer). I was like me too ... and he wants affection and love and fun.

So I'm keeping my distance until I MEET him. Because it might not work out and we might be like FU when we meet.

But I don't know, so I'll leave it at that.

He wants me to plan what to do as he said he's afraid I won't like what he chooses. I said dinner and movie? But now I'm thinking ... that's a bit much for a first meeting. So I have time to think on it.

But so far, for him, he has none of my specifics I look for in a guy but for some reason it just makes me feel warm and fuzzy. I like how he takes things slow, not like most guys that are like give me your number, lets meet tomorrow, what's your bra size and your favorite position. Yuck.

No, my guy takes it slow, which I like as I don't really like change and things that change FAST. So we're kind of endering to each other so far. I think we're both rusty in that department and both afraid of getting hurt ... but want a relationship. So slow and sure is the way. I don't mind this.

Though I told pooks this and I have a feeling ... I don't know, that he doesn't like this side of me.

Speaking of PIG guys, this guy I spoke with yesterday traded photos w/ me and sent me a pic of him nakie. Major...ew!! I couldn't believe it. WTF!? What's wrong with people?

Anyway, I'm still having a time finding a violin teacher. I know I don't have the OK for this job, but still, I'm feeling around and not finding anyone so far! ;(

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