Gosh and to think I just updated this diary about 10 hours ago!

Wow, time sure does fly. But I thought I'd make a mini diary entry as I'm feeling fiesty this morning.

Toto woke me up at 5:30 a.m. to go outside, so I let him out and he then wanted to play, to which I said absolutely NOT, I threw him on the bed and growled 'go to sleep!' So we sleep in until 10, I fed him, played a bit now he's sleeping. Geez o pete. I am getting real tired of waking up so early and then feeling bad when I leave for work.

Anyway, I sent out my resumes yesterday and have one to send out today with my Visa bill.

I swear I need to start saving moola and stop using my credit card. I got it and it was $477 - and that's way to much. I mean my limit is $600, what would happen if I really needed to use it?

So I put $148 from my Indiana account on it and then put $155 from my Michigan account on it, so $300 bucks isn't anything to laugh at now, so I must save money from now on. I get paid this week, and I'm already planning on what bills I have to pay in June since my car bill is due by June 17, I'll get paid on June 13, my birthday!

So I want to get my car bill out asap, so I'm not spending money like I have it anymore. My sister said we might go to Disney as a mini vacation over a weekend, so that means airline ticket, at least $250-300, room for what three days, we'd stay cheap so what $100 bucks or something, tickets for one day, uh $50? Food, at least $100. Man alive, I need to save at least $700!

Yeow.

I think I will save $300 to 400 from each of my checks (depending on month, might be just $200 cause of car/violin/exercise bills) or more and allow myself to spend $100 bucks on whatever. Okay that sounds like a good plan to me, I just always have to plan it out and talk it out to myself or else I won't do it lol. It's a bitch being paid shitty and raised to get anything you want.

My parents are giving me $100 bucks for my birthday - so I'm going to use that to pay for three months of the gym, though I"m a bit weary of this since what if I get one of these jobs? Or what if they don't offer exercise classes that I'll take, then I won't even use it.

Maybe I will hold off paying until the second week of classes so I can see the schedule.

Violin is $30 a month, I wonder if we'll be taking a month off (that's what I heard) and then I wonder if we finish that whole book and then go to book two in October.

Gawd I hope I'm out of here by then! Yeow. Even though I know violin lessons are so much more expensive, I see $30 for a half our lesson!!!! A WEEK!

My sister's teacher friend teaches violin/cello, so maybe I'll try to take one on one classes with him.

I plan to much, don't I? I swear that's the paginator in me, you have to plan everything out like this and then have back ups when one thing fails.

*Sigh* I'll be better I swear it.

I received my South Beach Diet book yesterday, I flipped through it a bit last night at 1 a.m. and was to tired to comphrend it. I did see you can have bread after three weeks, the one 'story' in there sounded JUST like me. I mean exactly with how the guy ate, like ate good morning and lunch, but that afternoon slump caused him to eat badly. That's what I do. I hear it's because of low blood sugar.

I did fairly well yesterday, though today I"m not sure what to take for lunch as of yet. I'm not going to eat out fast food anymore, god the other day I got a value meal at BK and it was $5! It was just a chicken sandwich, onion rings and a hi-c. Nothing was super sized or anything! Jesus!

Plus those salads at McD's and Wendy's are also $5.

That's nuts.

I'd rather spend $5 on some deli meat and cheese and have that with leftovers.

Oh well, I bought jalepenos yesterday because I"m going to make poppers w/o the breading. Yummy. I don't think I'll make them today, I feel a bit tired, I think I'll try them Friday.

Okay, so far, so good, I know I can do it this time, and if I do cheat I'm getting back up again and restarting because I need to get in that mindset of those low carb folks who know and have talked themselves into believeing that nothing is worth cheating with. It's weight loss town or bust!

I realized yesterday, I'm fat, but I look like someone who if she lost like 20 lbs, would look so vastly differently.

I mean really, 20 lbs, I think I would really have a body change. So I'm going to aim for that.

Damn I'd go from 272 to ... 252, wowooow, be in the 50's okay! Then another 20 ... 230...wow.

Gets me so excited. I know it's just the scale, but wow. If I could lose 10 lbs a month I'd be happy. But I will take what I can get.

I will have to really really pray they continue these exercise classes, I think I'll start lifting weights on my own on Fridays/Sat/Sun or walking or both. I've memorized my teacher's weight training class, so I could do that I guess.

It's just scary because that's a lot of changes in one's life, I mean eating differently, trying to stay focused, then those times like when I go home and my sister makes me eat bad, though I know I"m the one putting it in my mouth ... but still her tempting me constantly, it gets hard.

So oh well I'll stop going on and on and go start lunch and take a bath and try to read a bit more of that book, and pray my boss isn't a complete asshole today. Then go to my class tonight for aerobics (that kicks my ass, I sweat like a pig constantly)!

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pet ramps