Today was just so fast, I don't know where today went. I'm all screwed up, I thought today was Tuesday for some reason.

I got into work and two U.S. senators from Michigan were here, I just walked in and sat down, not really paying attention.

One of their supervisors/helpers took notice of me and looked at me like he knew me.

Anyway, they all left and I got to work. I paginated this hellish home improvement section, then wrote a story ... and that's bascially what I did today!

I wore my whorey top, this pretty sheer black scalloped quarter sleeved top with black tank under it, and these whorey gray slacks with a bell bottom cuff at the bottom, it's an really good feeling feminine outfit.

I bought some Eddie Bauer capris from Ebay - they are 22's, and I know last year the 24's were to big for me, I hope these fit though, I'll be pissed off if they don't!

I ate pretty badly today. I had fast (fat) food

Mom called and we went to lunch, I had fries and a cheeseburger, I ate to fast and barely tasted anything. I hate when I do that.

So I then went to the store since I've been making this WONDERFUL sugar free dessert that has cream cheese, SF jello and whipping cream in it.

Damn it's delicious, I could get the whole bowl!

I also bought some cranraisins with nuts to snack on.

I figure I'll cut carbs out and try to eat lowfat at the same time and not be so strict or mean when I screw up!

Oh well I'm leaving in 10 minutes to go to my aerobics class, then tonight I have to take a photo of this kid read thingy at 7 ish, so I'll hav to go all sweaty and red cheeked, but fuck it, it's only a minute to go in and say, SMILE, now what's going on, what, where, when...motherfuckers

ha I wish I could say that.

I miss cursing sometimes.

But anyway.

Josh is boring me out lately, he seems to be a religious freak, but hides it. He's pretty dull sometimes, I mean I hate when people curse like this that a**hole. Or f*** you. Shit, just say it already! Plus he talks about shit when I wasn't even born or way to young to remember, I can see we have only a bit in common, he wants to meet Friday, and I don't want to w/ my parents here and all.

I just want to say, leave me alone until I am ready.

I don't like this dating stuff, I want to much to fast. I think internet dating is fucking me up, I'd rather meet someone first then get to know them instead of vice versa.

It's to much on looks nowadays, I am superficial and somehow I refuse to date men who don't look at least decent in my eyes.

I know that's bad, but I kind of understand how skinny folks don't date us fatties. I mean I work out and I try to eat right and try to look good, I don't want a lazy fucker who will try to drag me down too.

I wish I could date someone who works out like, eats right and we could do that together.

But hell anymore I don't care. I'm getting older or something that fuck it, here I am take it or leave it.

*Sigh* I don't feel like exercising today for some reason, I have to go in four minutes and get undressed going from ultra chic to ultra shabby in my gym clothes.

I need to get new gym shoes as well.

I kind of want to start running or jogging, but I don't know yet, I think I'll take power walking.

All I know is I wish I could start losing again.

I better get going, gotta keep up with exercise if I want to do anything. I wish I hadn't had eaten those nuts and raisins and bad food. My stomach feels weriod. Thank god tomorrow is my last day before I have off! Yes! I also have to practice my violin tonight as I might have to play this difficult solo tomorrow for class, that is very scary, I know I do very well in violin, but still it's hard to live up to that. I am the best in class now - well now that that young girl screwed up when we went head to head and then she hasn't been here for two weeks.

Muh ha ha ha I am competitive! Not to mention arrogant, because I know I play well for someone at my level of learning.

MUH HAA HAAA HAAA. :) So what, can't I be a bit arrogant?

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pet ramps