I should be paginating right now, but God, I got into work and it was like bad day was written all over the walls.

I got a note in my box saying that I didn't follow directions that my boss left on putting standalone pics in the paper - that I didn't work on Sat. in this fucking parade - though I didn't know about it, plus I switched weekends with someone.

I'm a bit peeved at this because first off there was zero room for standalones, second off I thought the story on the seven army men saved was more important than a dumbass check presentation to Wendy's - and third off, fuck off!

I'm tired of getting yelled at and this up and down emotional rollercoaster my boss has.

Last night I talked with the sports/night editor and we both agreed on this, our boss just can say and do the meanst things, he doesn't know how to handle people, has had no managerial training whatsoever the way he treats us is just wrong.

I'm so fucking tired of coming into work, working my hands off and making sure everything is done and then getting yelled at and embarrassed (because everyone in the office has to know - I'm the 'example') and I think it's bullshit!

I'm tired of feeling like a kid when I come here, scared that 'what did I do now' feeling if I used a wrong color or whatever.

Jesus fucking Christ.

I read his letter, that he oh so nicely copied it to three other people and I just laughed and thought, fuck this.

His little jabs, meaness and all these little letters are beginning to mean nothing to me now, I'm so tired of it anymore.

I went to my desk and silently prayed to God to please, please please let me find a different job really really soon, and that maybe one of those resumes I sent last week will take hold.

Nothing would be as sweet as the day I say, here's my two week notice and nothing will be as lovely when I move back to Indiana and tear that fucking blue Michigan license plate off my car and replace my old plate.

Lordy be!

So God, please hurry and please make my employers see how much of value I could be to them and how this untapped talent can be hired quite cheaply.

So regardless, I was having a great day then I came into work and the whipping began. I don't know any manager that has ever done this to me.

None of them have ever been like this and God forbid should I ever have another that will, Jesus.

It's like, stop yelling at me already, everyday is a bad day and anymore, it's not Michigan I want to get away from, it's my boss.

I'm tired of it!!!!!

Anyway, this overshadows yesterday's meeting with Brandon, now I that I think of it, there was absolutely no attraction there, as I could've cringed at the thought of his chewed fingers touching me.

Oh well, I didn't want to get up this morning, I went to bed at 1 a.m. I couldn't sleep for some reason, I woke up to find the vent in the dining room had slid foward with this large gapping hole in it, and I wondered if that damn bat might get through it or if maybe it couldn't, I tried to imagine the technical aspects of vents, and I decided that it couldn't have...I guess I'll find out tonight.... *shutter*

So anyway, I weighed this morning and lost weight!

How did this happen? I dont' know. I'm at 271 - before I was like 277, lately I've been going potty all the time, so maybe it was water weight. I mean I would go like every hour!

It was crazy, but I don't mind, realllly I don't.

I'm beginning to take a kickboxing class on Tues. after circuit training because the teacher really is easy, I barely break a sweat! But doubling classes will help me out more and make me feel better at least.

Argh, I'm just so upset today! I have to paginate, train this dumbass in pagination, go to court, go to a meeting tonight ... go to exercise and then try to somehow squeeze in another section due tomorrow....

I mean come on, where do I have this time at? And really, am I paid enough to care so much? I make $20,300 now with my raise, so $300 dollars more a year, 1.5 percent, 34 cents more an hour, $10 more.

Am I really paid enough, treated well enough to care this much? God please send me another job!

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