Last night was very cool at the Field Museum, it was nice to get away and feel like home again.

I so want to work there now, it was amazing.

I touched a snake last night and a turtle, I've always wanted to touch a snake, and finally got to. Though, the snake was a dark orange, I made the lady laugh because Pookie asked if I could touch the snake, and then I told the lady if she could move the head away from me, so I rubbed it's side and it felt kind of weriod, like a oily leather, I kind of wanted to hold it, but wasn't daring enough. The turtles were cute too, I touched the shell, and came in a bit to fast and if my hand was near it's head, I think it would've bit me. Oh well, I also got to see them stuffing, disecting and saw a lion's skull, tendion and paw, it had just died at the Brookfield Zoo, it was very cool. The bloody mess dissection didn't gross me out as everyone was gagging, the man was not wearing gloves as he was cutting up a fox, he held up it's head, well skull, they took the skin off for they were going to stuff it, anyway, he cut the head/skull off and was explaining how young it was, the fox was found dead on the highway, and they were using it, the tongue was hanging out of the skull, the eyes were mush.

Anyway, I am kind of happy to be going back, the house is a mess, my sister has all her teaching stuff in my bed room, I have a tiny bath to my bed, I mean, it's horrible, I can't get out of bed even, I have to swing my legs all the way over to get out, it's really that bad, I hate that, her room is even worse, we look like junk people, even her shit is onthe stairs going upstairs and that's scary since you can fall, and her shit is in the living room even. It's so bad, I wonder sometimes how she can live like this. She said she cleaned the bathroom last night, but yet, the tub is a nice shade of orange on the corners, and round the handles there is mold, it's gross. How can you live like that?? It makes me ill to bathe in it. The grout needs to be redone and it needs to be re-caulked and resealed. If she could only do that, it would be easy to clean. And it would'nt cost more than $20 since we already have the tools and some materials....

I mean yes we still have loads of Grandma's shit with little room, but guess what we have a basement with room, I just hope when I move back here, she gets her shit straightened out because this is disgusting, she's so lazy and dirty. The grass needs to be mowed, weeds pulled, kitchen cleaned, I mean that alone is bad, I always say keep kitchens and bathrooms the cleanest in the house, those say the most about you. Keep your house clutter free, put shit away after you take it out. Is that so hard? Clean when it begins to look dirty.

It irrates me, which is why I'm happy to go back to my room in Michigan, where I have ROOM and space and I would'nt be embrassed if someone were to pop by.

Oh well, I saw the WORST photo of me yesterday! It was from my dad's retirement party and I looked HUGE, I mean the way the angle was, I looked like 400 lbs. I wanted to rip it up, but I couldn't and what's worse is everyone at the school has this photo! Jesus! Then yesterday I took a photo w/ Pooks and I looked like a monster! I pray he doesn't put those up on his web page. I did take a few great photo's of pooks. I really like photography, it's fun and I notice I just walk up and take photo's anymore, I have that "I don't care" way, and anymore it's like well if they don't like it, they can say something and in my experience the public doesn't really like to say anything.

Okay so anyway, I can't wait to begin Atkin's, I just can't believe how fat I look, I mean I thought I lost some weight, but in reality I still look big. I am tired of looking this way, tired of my sister rubbing it in my face. I think I'm just ready this time, I'm tired of this, so tired of it.

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