I think I became a vegitarian somewhere. I realized, I have no meat in the house, just rice and PB&J. I mean, I don't eat as much anymore, and I'm okay with that. I guess if I cut the candy out, I'd be doing okay. I made Kraft Mac and Cheese and it was icky, I have another box of it and a bowl of it left over and yuck, maybe I will toss that out. I have to go shopping, maybe I will this weekend with my parents, or maybe ... later... I just don't like to cook big meals just for me, now if friends were up, I'd make a good meal with meat.

But I think if I want meat, I'll just get a small cheeseburger from McD's because I don't want to cook.

I told my mom I wish I was home and she was like, that is your home and i was like YEAH...sure. Then she was like, you'd be bored, I said GOOD. She said you'd be shoveling here too, I said GOOD. She didn't like that.

Oh well, I got up with the intentions of working out, so I got up at 10, and shoveled for 40 MINUTES got back in and died. My back felt like a knot that was twisting harder and harder. I said, "I'll do it tomorrow." So I'm leaving at 12:30 today, I work at 1 till, I don't know when...8? I try to leave an hour early, I dont' know why I just don't stay another hour, or even half that hour, but I just get nervous about having to drive here because I dont' like to drive at night. Last night some fucking ass hole drove behind with his fucking high beams on. I slowed down and he finally passed and then I flashed my lights at him. What a dick. I can't see well at night, with all the headlights. So it scares me.

Oh well, It's nearing 12 and I'm thinking of ways to stay home again, I know I can't, but I am always schemeing on ways to get out of here.

Everyone seems so happy for me and not one can understand how I feel about hating it here, being so alone with no friends or anyone. Yeahhhh I love thattt!

Oh well, if I have to shovel again I think I will scream, literally scream. My mom said Spring in coming and I didn't believe her. It could be a thousand degrees and I'd still hate it here, though I'd be less burdened by shoveling, I'd have more time to be alone.

I just keep thinking, they are coming up Friday, then for a week in Easter, then May comes and school ends and they arrive for the summer. Then leave in August, and return in December, and I'm praying to be out of here by then, just anytime I'd live to leave.

�

pet ramps