I finally got the courage today to ask my boss when I'll get to start my new job. So I e-mailed her and an hour or so later a man comes to my desk and I go into another back office. I know this man, he's the one who hired on and helps the new reporters, this man is someone I should kiss ass to.

So he apologizes for taking so long and I say, no problem, I just want to start already! SO I talk up myself like it's a job interview and do some name dropping and am generally happy towards this man who smells of cigarettes and is wearing a girl's bracelett...what's up with that.

SO I find tomorrow I start training, for just half a day or so...then so on I will begin finally moving into this job. I have 25 hrs a week, part time. No talk of raise yet, though I believe there should be. I have to ask my boss next time I can snag her out from avoiding me. I know the man who'll be my new boss, he's really cool, though once he asked me for to type something, and my face was in his..well..um...and it was kinda embrassing since I was sitting down...and um...it's okay now. lol I type a regular police DUI paper for him and never has he complained, so I believe he will be easy to work for. I'm worried about shaking off my typist statis and will have to tell people, no I cannot type that, I am not a typist anymore. How lovely.

They told me I will get a laptop of my own. They've been trying for 6 months to get it and now they got it and will give it to me. I guess before they were having reportings do the police blotter, it takes time, time the reporters don't have. So that's why I was hired, so I could take over and do this on my own, tomorrow I'll be taken to a few of the stations and introduced. I feel like I'm in the 1880's sometimes because of all this introduction shit. Like when I interviewed the chancellor of purdue, his secretary asked me if I knew him, I said only in passing...and she introduced us. I felt like Eliza Dolittle.

Oh well, I am reading a new book Jemina J by...something Green. It's about a fat girl, her problems and she adores this man who she has an internet fling with and oops it's the man she loves in her office, so she loses weight, because he wants to meet her. This is the story of my life. The girl in the book is oddly enough a Journalist...and oddly enough has green eyes..ooohh..mine are blue/green/gray/yellow freaky ish...from direct Swedish decent (my great-great grandpa was from there.) So maybe that's why I'm blonde and fat...like Swiss Miss ....

OH Okay anyway, this book is SO neat, I can say, yes I agree, but then I can Noo no..fat people aren't all that over-obsessive about their bodies..or are they? She is right though, she said she's on a constant diet, every day of her life...forever. How true. Okay, I want to write a research article about this. I think it's interesting in light of the Shallow Hal horrid film, how could Gwen say this movie would help the fat population? I mean breaking booths and eating extremely is not really how I want to be portrayed. OH so I wonder if I write up some proposals, some magazine might pick it up. My research would be quite fun, interviews to the fat bias and such. Hmm I love that stuff.

One thing that Jemina does, is eat badly just to lose weight. Near the middle of the book she decides to lose weight, so she goes to a gym and a man gives her a program and how to eat right. This is good, but she takes it a step further, by doing twice what the man tells her excercise wise, and eats only half of what he says...for instance she has warm water with 1/2 slice of lemon for breakfast, lunch is a half of salad with veggies...and dinner is...I forgot. She says that she feels guilty even eating GOOD things, I can relate to her. I mean when you diet it feels like eating is horrid, like anything is going to keep you fat. Sometimes I dread having to eat, thinking about what to eat. Today I SO so so wanted to go to Taco bell and get a chicken quesdilla...but I said NO jenny, nO nooo nooo, went home made a Baloney sandwich and had a bag of chips and 1/2 a glass of pop and now I'm munching on carmal corn from the boy scouts...see lately we haven't had pop in my house, so it's a luxury now. Today I'm having my dad buy diet pop....and some lean cuisines...or whatever for my lunches. I keep saying that I need to go shopping for myself, especially for lunch, since I have nothing to really eat. I need to get into cooking again, but nothing really sounds good right now, except easy stuff like FAsT food. What's wrong with me?

So I will exercise today when I get home from class because I didn't exercise yesterday because I felt to tired, a cop out. I want to do taebo again, but damn I'm scared....I hurt so bad last week, today I will have to lay off when I feel like I have trunk legs with the rusted hinges of hip joints or a knotted lower back that feels like a wet knot being pulled more taunt.

I was thinking that with this part time bs that when I graduate I can actually join a gym or something. I'll have a lot of time then. My fellow typist, skinny bitch, was like, you should quit and just go for that job in Indy. Yeah, so you can take my promotion? You whore. She was like, I know some people who can fill your job. Yeah have her running scared since she doesn't do shit, I do the most in typing. YEAH...scared now. And when I tell the others, HA FUCK YOU SMUGE MOTHER FUCKERS. I feel like Al Pacino now.

Okay...um yeah...um I think I might try WW again for a bit since I'm doing the USDA pyramid ...diet shit...it's the SAME fucking thing except there is no points, some crude pyramid of how you ate for the day...shows me NOTHING. Just saying, fuck I need more veggies and fruit. SO we'll see....thank god Diet Pop is zero points. Most of my points go to drinks anyway....

Ow, my arms hurts...ow ow ow I think I pulled a muscle helping my dad carry out our old patio doors that weigh a billion tons...owowowoowow!!! :( Maybe today is a treadmill day...and elliptical day. My Ma said I looked fabulous today, I wore pants my sister gave me ...they are Jones New York, ala' funky sizes...I can wear a 20 in them...what's up with that??! I kinda feel like I lost weight, or else where are these stretch marks comeing from....but when I look at my body in the mirror, it just looks like the fat is falling down...like dripping down my body...this sounds gross...but I don't have that fluffy fat anymore, I have gravity laden fat that is quickly wanting to reach the floor...I don't know if this is good or bad, or if I'm getting old or what! I still have stretch marks on my breasts....Jesus lord, leave them be. I'm a B/C cup and maybe loseing weight I'll be a A cup...oh no....ugk.

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