WELL TODAY I'm seriously hurting.

I did my Elliptical Trainer yesterday for about 15 mins...I thought it was so easy...and today...my legs *hurt* and the worst part is, I have to walk to school today! EEP! So I'm getting out of my business attire and putting on comfy jeans and tennis shoes.

Mr. Internet told me to call him last night, and I did and he wasn't home. This morning he says, he fell asleep...and hope I have a good day. I kept thinking, man I'm fed up with this shit already. I mean I chicken out to go out on Friday, he chickens on Sat. Fuck this I'm tired of this game.

This guy I used to talk to, is coming to see me sometime this week or next at school, he works in the computer lab and he's bi, which is why I refused to date him...well I think he's the one I used to talk to who was bi. So I'm like I don't care, I mean there's nothing in this meeting that I'm nervous about, I haven't talked to him in months and all of the sudden he wants to come and meet me. What the fuck is that.

I'm kinda settling into my jobs and school right now. I'm tired today because this morning the air was SO cool and I just wanted to roll over and not go to work today. I love cold weather, which is why I'm walking to school instead of driving.

Right now I'm eating vanilla yogurt with fruit mixed in. I made this yesterday in a tall glass ala' Mcdonald's Fruit n' Yogurt Parfit w/o the Granola, simply because I don't have any granola in the house. It's okay, but I think I might get a coke to drink. I swear I love pop and sometimes I can come home from school have a Coke and that's all I need for my dinner. Probably not to healthy, but man when you're tired you just don't even feel like eating.

Oh well I am trying to get a group together so we can all go see Blue Man Group again. I've seen it twice now, once in Chicago and once in Las Vegas. I love the show, and we're going to get front row, which is scary since they come down and stare at you with no emotion on your face. It's freaky and when they walk around the audience, you pray they don't pick you, to pick on. SO WHY DO I WANT FRONT ROW? Well why not? You get to wear a poncho since the paint they use sprays into the first rows, and at the end, the have huge rolls of paper, white, that the audition passes to the front in one long stream...with neon lights, it look so cool and the music is blaring and strobe lights going...shit it's fucking fun as hell. From what I've seen in both showings, there is a sea of white paper in the front, and the front rows are drowning in it!

ALTHOUGH, when I was in Vegas, a HUGE glob of the paper hit me and my sister and I was literally suffocating in the mess, I nearly stood up, but instead riped myself a hole so I could breath and at the same time push the paper down into the row ahead of me. This probably all sounds so strange, but you'd have to see it, to really know what I'm talking about! I SOOO recommend the show.

ANYWAY, I just remembered I have to go to the school paper office and pick up one of my letters of recommendation! SHIT! I'm trying for this fellowhship in Indianapolis -- you get to work with Pultze (fuck I can't spell) prize winnering journalists and write for the Indy Star. I dont plan to work in Indianapolis, but this is a very GOOD experience, and possibly a lead to a job. The only draw back, should I get it, is that I would have to quit my job at the newspaper here, because I'd be gone a month or two I think. OH WELL...I haven't got it yet, haven't EVEN filled out the form. I need 3 letters of recommendation, I have ONE so far, the other two will be I think one from my internship with the paper, and the other..him..I don't know, my teacher I guess.

I was going to start on my masters when I graduate..and I need yet another 3 letters of recommendation. This sucks, I feel so stupid asking for them, like they don't like me enough to write good on me. I don't know......I mean the people I ask either are like OKAY! Or they look at me like OH SHIT...I dont.... I've been turned down by a teacher who said he wasn't familiar with my writing anymore...what the fuck is that? I wanted to say, you know it's not like this letter really means anything, not like they will come question you, NOT LIKE I CAN'T WRITE, this teacher was leaving PUC and I think he was to lazy to just write the fucking thing. It really hurt my feelings a lot he had done this, since I worked for him last year, and took a class with him.

ANYWAYyyyyyyyyyyy I got to wear my new outfit today...eee! Then I wore my hair down..and realized people treated me different with it down. With it's up, I'm the business Jen...the adult Jen..when it's down I'm young punk kid Jen. I really like to wear it down, but it gets crazy...naturally curly hair doesn't mix with windy days....my hair is described by EVERYONE I KNOW as "the lion's Mane" because it gets so wacky and shit. I hate it, I love it.

Just wish I didn't have to wear it pinned back in the front or up in a clip...just totally down would be nice, though I know it'll never happen with it's craziness!

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pet ramps