Ug. I'm at work once again.

I'm not feeling very well right now. I have a major headache, feel dizzy and tired.

I think I ate to much sugar - is there such a thing as sugar poisoning??

I had a turkey roll up thingy for dinner and a big piece of cherry pie. I had a few hard candies and now I feel like hell.

I keep getting worried I'm gonna get diabetes since two of my co-workers just were told they have it! I was like, lordy I eat sugar like a hummingbird, I mean anything sweet, I love.

So, my diet hasn't been that great lately, I feel fat now, I mean I saw myself in the mirror and was like, damn I look like a fucking pig. I mean what happened to slimming down Jen?

I'm poo pooed all my hobbies lately, no violin or exercise for these two weeks.

I did play the violin last night to my surprise I did alright, I'm trying to practice for whenever I do my office solo, so I'm trying to memorize some songs. It's funny to see how I've progressed, I mean I played the itzy bitzy spider~!!! I could NOT play that before it sounded horrid. Now I sing it in my mind and it comes out well.

I do scratch, slide and squeak a lot still, but I've gotten better with hitting other strings, and found out last night when I kept hitting the A string while playing E was that I was holding the violin wrong, so that was a nice suprise/lesson for me to learn.

OKAY listen up: I'm thinking about trying Weight Watchers again I know, I know, I poo pooed that so long ago and said it sucked ... but ... I do want to try it again after meeting a girl who lost 70 lbs on it and didn't even exercise!!

So I'm thinkin' about buying it off of the WW site since it's the 2003 collection or whatever. I don't want to do the meetings, naw, no thanks not enough time nor money to do that kind of thing.

But I figured, Atkins is way to strict for me anymore, I'm just not committed enough nor have the schedule to plan plan plan my food and then eat nothin' but meat and cheese and eggs.

I'm so tired of those foods.

Really I am.

So I figured I could go on WW at least and keep track of my foods and still not eat those breads, pastas, etc. I mean that's something at least that I can keep track of. Cause right now my stomach feels so full, my head hurts so bad, I wonder if this is a carb rush? I mean I go low carb off and on, so I'm sure my body is like what the fuck are you doing Jen?

We'll see, I'm ready to order that kit, although I'm back in 'no money' land since I paid $90 for those tickets for my parents, I think I have only $160 in my account...and I don't get paid until the 22! Plus my credit card is maxed out, or near it at least.

So shopping w/ my sister this week should be fun...er...I'm not buying anything lol!! Plus I know when we go out and eat I have to pay on my own...damn. And fuck, gassing up my car?

I'm going to take like $60 out of the bank tomorrow so I'll have some money to live on the next fucking two weeks or so!

OMG I HAVE TO PAY FOR GYM and violin still...that's $70 dollars.

Fuck. I'm going to have zero in my account. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck, I hate being poor.

I think I'll call on the credit card gods and see what my limit is at... Damn it why can't I get that new job, because I seriously cannot live on this money, I mean this car bill is KILLING ME.

Fuck! My mom offered to pay too for those fucking tickets!!! Damn!!!! Maybe they'll slip a $20 in my purse like they do now and then cause man alive I'm low this time.

I hate living like this, fat, unhappy, single, living with parents, virgin Jen.

Yeah I'm a fucking winner.

My dad saw that cute lawyer, and er...he said he was my father and he said he knew me with a big smile. But I think he's gay or something or shy or just doesn't like me cause I'm so young...but still we'd make such a nice couple and to have that man hung on my arm would be such a very very nice accessory for me to flaunt....

Wow I can imagine that one...le purr.

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pet ramps