I got the feeling today that I won't be interviewed for that job I applied for where I work. I just have this feeling, it's been a week already and just the way they look at me, I have this feeling.

Today, I so wanted to quit, I hated my job today, the fucking people. I was ready to say so long you mother fuckers, thanks for nothing, thanks for making me feel like I'm not a good reporter, writer and worker, thanks for your dirty looks and ignoring me.

Then I got home and realized I hated where I lived, I just hated it. My mom is acting sick today, she does it sometimes when it seems she wants attention, sitting in her bed one minute all shits and giggles, the next acting like she's losing her voice and she's on her death bed. It's all an act, she likes to lay in bed and watch TV in the dungon basement, then ask for a glass of pop and then say, "I can't exercise today because I'm sick, so bring me a tuna on rye."

Then I kept thinking, well that job in Michigan would be nice, but I'd have to be on my own, move out, and still, I said to myself, it's still like living at home because it's about 20 minutes to our cottage, and that's just ... to close. Drop in visits, phone calls each day, it's still to close.

I also said I would start my BFL diet and I'm just to tired and cranky to. I don't feel like lifting weights, I just feel like walking on the treadmill with some music, ooh like Jude or Fiona Apple ... something heavy, blaring. That's just such a great thing, talk about getting away. It's just one of those days you feel really unhappy and upset about your life. I hope my horoscope for today is true. I'm beginning to hate my life and don't want to be one of those people who hate their life.

Gemini horoscope for Monday, February 11

Anger and resentment pass away sometime between dawn and dusk. As

your life improves, it's no longer so important to look back and

keep score. You stand on the brink of a triumphant new adventure.

Hm, I sent in my resume to the small newspaper today, and last night I started talking to this guy who lives 20 mins from me ... I don't even feel like dating anymore, to much shit and having a guy sweet talk me, it's just BS shit, is anyone ever real anymore, they just want to get in your pants then go on about getting into a relationship. "What's the wildest thing you've ever done?" he asked ... " Left work 20 minutes early," I mumbled.

Where are the deep thinkers, I'm so tired of these fucking morons who never stop to think about things, or notice things, it makes me wonder if I'm the only one living sometimes. If fucking, drink and doing drugs is all these people have that is "wild" then what's wrong with me? I just feel the odd man out more than 1/2 the time, I'm the third wheel of society. Oh well, I've been listening to this song so much lately, aww, I really like verses like this, fuck I dig this shit, like Fiona's verses or Paula Cole, damn where do they come up with this stuff? Oh well, if you ever have a chance, download this song from Morpheus or Napster should it ever work again ...

Jude -- I Know .

You've got such a pretty smile. It's a shame the things you hide behind it. Let um go give it up for a while... Let um free and we will both go find it.

I know there's no where you can hide it. I know the feeling of alone. I know that you do not feel invited, But come back, come back in from the cold.

Step away from the edge. Your best friend in life is not your mirror. Back away come back away come back away... I am here and I will be forever and ever and i...

I know that there's no where you can hide it. I know the feeling of alone. Trust me and don't keep that on the inside. Soon you...you'll be locked out on your own.

You're not alone....

You're not alone....

And don't say you've never been told. I'll be with you till we grow old... Till am old grown and i'm cold...

I'm not further beyond the grown.. I'll be with you till we grow up young.. Like a dog you can always come home.. Pick up a bone.. Look around town baby down town Don't throw me to the pound.. Look around look around...

�

pet ramps