It's been a long and shitty weekend - I went to Michigan and now I'm home and very very tired.

AND CRANKY.

I didn't get much sleep, my parents seem to enjoy waking up at 7 o'clock their time, 6 ours ... I planned on sleeping in next weekend, but it seems I'm going back up with my stupid friend. I'm in such a bad mood ... my dog wanted out, and our door is broken - so that pissed me off majorly.

Then my sister who always makes me mad ... has to bug me...all about fucking MONEY. I'm so TIRED OF MONEY. I just got a job and I HAVE NO MONEY!!!

I get a check every two weeks for $300 - so that's $600 a month, my car payment and other things take out at least 450, leaving me with $150...I have to buy gas ... so let's see I have about $125 to play around with, not to mention that I'm going to Las Vegas at the end of August, and don't have ANY money saved up, since I JUST got my job ... then there is my sister who makes $30,000 a year, to my less than $10,000 a year ... she's full time, I'm part. She has her degree, I won't until December ... and she's asking ME to chip in for everything! ***PLEASE***

It's sad that I deperately need to buy clothes for work and for the vegas trip, not to mention a new pair of gym shoes ... so needless to say I have been a mooch because she doesn't realize that I'm not making her large sums of money.

*THEN* We're talking about next year at this time when my parents leave the house to us, and we take over payments....she's saying I need to pitch in! LIKE I don't know this...I'm like well if I could get a HIGH PAYING FULL TIME JOB, I think I would, like I LIKE to be counting where all my fucking MONEY goes...like I LIKE to not be able to do SHIT because THE ECONOMY IS SO GOD DAMN BAD. Man I wish I lived in her world so that I could go out and just pick up a job and be merrily making some money instead of part time 8 bucks an hour shit. Wouldn't that be nice? She doesn't realize that when SHE graduated college, she had a car given to her by MOM AND DAD, then she saved and BOUGHT her car -- and has been living rent free and been able to SAVE money, while I had to get a job to buy a car just to go to work in, and will graduate with RENT MONEY DUE, and not have much of a savings account for a while. She says, "Well look at my point of view having to spend and keep you and me up ..." Yeah well YOUR side looks better than MINE!!! Gawd, I'm just so mad today, I mean I could just cry. I guess this post-PMS going on, but I am seriously TIRED of everyone and ready to BLOW. I need a serious vacation.

I keep thinking about weight loss and feeling like a pig and I can't wait for school to start on the 27th, all I want to do is go to the exercise classes, I know I will feel better after I know I'm doing something new and something my body isn't used to like my treadmill. I see it as I won't even have time to eat, I'll go to work M-F 10-3 and school is 3:30 to 6:30 Monday/Wed -- and Tues/Thursday I'll probably have to work at my second job (which is only $6 an hour, and only like 6-10 hrs a week - yahoo, extra cash...)so I'm thinking I'll be at work or at school Mon. through Thursday, and Friday I only work 10-3 -- Sat/Sun are off days ... so that's little time to snack or even eat meals...I can see myself living on water and carrots or some sort of bars, like I do at work. I always get home and refuse to stop at fast food, and am so tired to even cook myself dinner and just settle for a can of pop. God...my life sucks right now. Somehow I didn't find myself doing this short of shit when I thought of my college days when I was in high school, having people pay for me, and being fucking poor and going to college to graduate in a SHIT ecomoy full of ass hole newspapers who probably won't HIRE me because they won't need anyone, so I'll just be a fucking typist all my damn life. God, please let me write the great american novel and become rich so I don't have to bitch like this anymore. Oh yeah and let me become skinny.

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pet ramps