My parents came up last night, which was nice to have company.

I cleaned the house the day before, and after my aerobics class, I got home and shoveled the WHOLE driveway. I was out there an hour!! I got really cold, I think I have that Raynard's disease, where your hands and feet just can't cope with the cold.

I mean I couldn't feel them at all and this was only being out there a few minutes and they changed color to a bright red and then hurt like mad.

Oh well, SO my exercise class went fine, I went a bit late because I had to write a quick article on this boy who had a crime spree and was arraigned in court, so I ran all over getting info. I got to the gym at like 5:03 and they were just finishing stretching! So I hauled ass and got in line, there were a lot of people there, like 8 of us in total, it's a small room, and last time there was only I think 3 or 4 of us.

SO, she kicked my ASS this time, I thought I'd fall over, she did some new things and I thought I would just die, we had two breaks where I ran and got water. My face was beet red and my hair was wet from sweat. I was a complete mess, my hair was coming undone, lol I looked scary.

But I kept on, and was happy to see one of the violin students in the class, she's a nice middle aged woman who always makes you feel like everything is alright, she laughs and you just have to laugh with her.

I actually stayed in step this time, I got off track, but kept on. After class the teacher told me I improved, so I was so very happy happy.

I was just giddy that I did the sass-shay step, which I really hate because it's like running...woo...

Oh well, my shoulders/arms were very sore yesterday and she made up do pushups, it was so hard, I wanted to cry! I got home last night and took a salt bath and then took ibruphoen and watched tv and then turned on my heating blanket and crashed.

It was a nice night.

So anyway, I don't know if I put in here yesterday that my boss told me that he was proud I'm taking these classes and could tell already?

I wanted to cry when he said this, I didn't know what to say, and I was a bit embarassed and also happy.

For me, I can tell a little that I've lost, my parents say they can really see it, but I just cannot, I guess we're our own worst critic. I look in the mirror and say, okay I can see in the abs area I've lost.

Then I look and see my ass looks monsterous. I've never had big butt problems, but it looks like my fat is dropping down, like falling down my body from my shoulders into my abs and from my abs into my ass, then hips.

I know I'll keep with these classes because they do a lot for the legs, and I need this.

So, I dropped a pound today, I'm at 278 now. Yippeee finally I'm losing again, though like I said before, I wonder if I'm gaining muscle, losing inches?

I can't wait to keep at these classes for another week, and then see myself after two weeks.

I think this Fri. I will double up the classes, take my strength training and then aerobics, lord, but this is only if we don't go over board. Everything has hurt on my body now except my legs.

I wonder if walking on the treadmill has helped this at all, maybe built them up to sustain more?

I hope so because I know friday is lower body work, ug, I can't imagine the things we will do. We do ab work every time in each class and last night I thought I'd die there on the mat, it was just so hard for me last night for some reason.

Oh well I'm just blabbing on and on.

I'm going today at lunch to get the plates for my car, lord it makes me an official michigan person. Oh puke. I keep my Purdue Alumni sticker on my car though, I do not want to be a Michigan person, I'd rather be my old self, Indiana girl, maybe even Illinois, for this is definately not my home.

Yes, I still want to get the hell out of here. Yet there are zero jobs back at home or there are, but there are people with more experience then me...they want at least 2 years, or 3, I don't have a year yet (I will in March) but regardless, a year is something isn't it?

But I can see on my resume, how young I look, news designer with one year experience seeks job in Chicago area.

Doesn't sound as great as two or three years. Maybe reporter with a year and three months experience ...

Hm.

My day will come, I know it will, I'm just tired of waiting and all these doubts.

Oh well, I have my violin lesson tonight, I hope it stays in tune, it's been out of tune off and on, and then sometimes stays in tune perfectly. The E string is fucked up, the automatic tuner says it's not in tune, but if I turn the peg more, I just know it'll break, just like my D string :( which was very tramatic, let me tell you, new string, snaps, these strings cost $25 for just four! That's ... hell $5.50 a string or something. D-string is the most important to the class now, it's all that we play, that and A, G and E are kind of more advanced for us, ... when that string broke, I yelled out in anger and saddness, luckily I had two sets for my old violin and the new one, so I got the old violin's d-string, which was kind of sad in itself that I could do that...oh well.

I practiced a lot this week, I think like three times. It was just fun for me. I'm trying to learn 'My favorite things' by heart, and I have a lot of it down. What is so great about violin is that it's easy to learn the song, because it repeats itself so much and just mixing it up a bit makes it sound all different. Plus I'm trying the star spangled banner, but that is hard too, I have a lot of problems playing faster songs and also jumping around on the strings, like from F# to E#, whoa...lol it squeaks and scratches saying, what are you doing!?

heh heh I have gotten a bit better though, which is why I think I'll practice all the more so I can get used to these types of things. I'm so happy I took this class, I really enjoy it a lot to be able to play. I think I should work on performing because that makes me nervous and I stop playing, when I should just keep on going. But hell I've been playing for five months now...has it really been that long?

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pet ramps